It’s Katie. Of all the years in which we’ve lived, 2015 was just straight up mediocre. As a result, we are going to list all the arm pit moments of 2015. Because laughing about it takes away the sting.
In 2015 our dog ate a pound of skittles, a bag of candy corn pumpkins, and a plethora of kleenexes. We found 21 pairs of underwear under our bed last month, concluding that Gracie Belle Raines is a hoarder.
We never raked our leaves this fall and ate way too much candy, resulting in a combined weight gain of 22 new POUNDS.
Tr3nt here (Like my new name? It’s kinda like Tech N9ne)
When we say new pounds we mean that they are pounds we’ve never gained before. Yikes. Poor bathroom scale. I guess we get to start the 40 year journey of losing weight and gaining it back again. Yippee.
Let me list all the great new things this year brought:
Ok well that was fun!
I don’t want to seem jaded. I did get a really cool drone. “But the FAA won’t let me be. or let me be me, so let me see.” -Eminem …or something like that.
Also, as a 2015 bonus I now get super nauseous every time I try to do any vigorous athletic activity, and I am going bald…which are both fun.
Back to Katie.
I think Trent would look hott bald.
In 2015 we spent approximately $875 driving from Topeka to Kansas City, back to Topeka.
We found 2 bats and a mouse in our house.
We got turned down for a mortgage because we don’t have enough credit history…the bank literally said “you would be better off if you had missed some payments because at least then you would have the history.” Stop.
Promptly signed up for 1 million credit cards, which we then paid off each month. We don’t understand this game. Trent said it’s like playing Monopoly with a 6 year old who makes their own rules.
In 2015 I decided I don’t ever want to do makeup as a career. Although I did consider being a mortuary cosmetologist because dead people don’t talk. Trent shot down that idea.
We sold most our stuff and don’t have a dining room table. We eat on the couch with pillows. Convenient until you make spaghetti. A story in itself for another day.
Trent again. (already gave up on Tr3nt…It was a phase, I’m over it.)
No one got stabbed in our front yard on Halloween this year, but our neighbors did move out after the stabbing. The neighbors on the other side promptly followed. Probably because of the stabbing. That left us with our shared driveway all to ourselves for like 6 months which was great! …until I backed into the realtor and dented Katie’s new car. I would have normally looked but thanks to that house being empty for 6 months, no one was EVER parked in the driveway. I yelled a lot.
I murdered Houdini the mouse (who was living in our mudroom). I am not proud of it, but it had to be done.
It’s Katie. I am glad Houdini is dead.
And I am glad 2015 is almost over.